Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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