my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
