why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
