I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
