just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
