I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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