I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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