roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
