on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
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