apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
