try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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