P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
