we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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