How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
You are a genius and a whore.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize