fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
