If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
