Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
