he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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