No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
