Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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