Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
