Can i not drive my cunt home
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
