Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
