the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
