Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Who died my cat blue again?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
