either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
dude i'm inner monologue high
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
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