He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize