i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
