Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
