would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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