I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Enjoy the penises
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
