He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
