i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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