If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just invented taco cereal.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize