Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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