That's intense
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize