sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
