Buhtt sex?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
