she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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