have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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