im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
