he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
