How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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