We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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