I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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