Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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