I cockslap morals
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize
