that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
