the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize