Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
